March 18, 2024

The 8 Purposes of Sex, an Undefiled Bed, and Chesterton

ONE Thought (from us)

Ok, so we don’t always talk about sex, but this is the fourth time we’ve talked about it in the past two months! Today, we’d like to suggest you consider your perspective on sex in terms of the purpose it serves in your marriage. You may agree that sex is good and a grace from God—and that He has filled it with His wonderful purposes. But do you know what those purposes are?

There are at least eight purposes of sex as God designed it:

  1. God’s glory: He made it, it’s good, he delights in our enjoyment of it, and we can give glory, gratitude, and honor to him in it.
  2. Fruitfulness: Procreation—fulfill the cultural mandate in Genesis: be fruitful and multiply…
  3. Dominion: Every time you enjoy intimacy the way God intended, you are fulfilling His call to humanity to occupy and subdue the earth the way he expressed in the cultural mandate (See Gen 1; you’ll need to listen to this week’s podcast episode if you’re curious about this one.)
  4. Unity: Most couples don’t drift toward connectedness. Regular intimacy unifies you.
  5. Exclusivity: God created it for the marriage covenant between one man and one woman alone
  6. Our Enjoyment: (Need we say more?)
  7. A Gospel Reminder: being able to be naked and unashamed with your spouse is a reminder of what God’s love is like. In Christ, you are fully known and still fully loved by God despite your sin, mistakes, and brokenness (note: all of these ideas are found in depth in Fierce Marriage (the book) and See-Through Marriage)
  8. Comfort: when we are going through grief or a trial and we need to go to the familiar place that is our spouse for intimate fellowship that is exclusive and saved only for us. See Gen 24:67.

Until you understand the purposes of sex, you may miss out on some of the blessing to be had. So, we encourage you to

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”
(Hebrews 13:4)


ONE Quote (from another)

“Love means loving the unloveable — or it is no virtue at all.”
– G.K. Chesterton


ONE Question (for you)

Of the eight purposes above, which one seems most relevant to your life today? Why not discuss that one with your husband/wife?


Note: We also covered this topic in this week’s podcast episode! We encourage you to give it a listen or a watch!

Until next week, stay fierce!

Ryan & Selena Frederick
Founders of Fierce Marriage