Accountability, Communication, Podcast, Unity

Help! My Wife Wears Yoga Pants to the Gym and I Hate It

two person inside gym exercising

Today we responded to a question from a listener about his wife wearing yoga pants to the gym. Is he right in objecting to it? Listen in to find out!

Watch, or Listen Below!

Transcript Shownotes

Subscribe to the Fierce Marriage Podcast on Apple Podcasts
Subscribe to the Fierce Marriage Podcast on Google Podcasts
Subscribe to the Fierce Marriage Podcast on Spotify
Subscribe to the Fierce Marriage Podcast via RSS

Today we responded to a question from a listener about his wife wearing yoga pants to the gym. Is he right in objecting to it? Listen in to find out!

Master marital communication:

Take the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge:

Pray for your spouse with intention:

Scripture, Show Notes, and Resources Mentioned

  • Referenced scripture:
    • 1 Timothy 2:8-10
    • 1 Peter 3:1-4
    • 1 Corinthians 10:31-33
    • Proverbs 31:30

Full Episode Transcript

Ryan: All right, Selena, I think we might be kicking a hornet’s nest today. But you know-

Selena: What’s new?

Ryan: Sometimes the nest needs to be kicked, right?

Selena: Sometimes, yes.

Ryan: Although our culture has its golden calves, sometimes that golden calf needs to be cast in the flames.

Selena: Okay. But my question is, should you wear yoga pants while you’re casting, kicking the hornet’s nest, or casting the idol into the fire? [Ryan Laughs] This is the question. We will answer this on the other side.


Ryan: I’m laughing because I’m picturing Aaron and the Israelites wearing yoga pants. [both Laughs]

Selena: That’s funny. I was not thinking that.

Ryan: Actually it would’ve been Moses wearing yoga pants if he’s casting them in a fire.

Selena: You know? And they just didn’t have that type of material yet, I don’t think. [Ryan Laughs] Just kidding.

Ryan: And mixed fabrics, right?

Selena: No Mixed fabrics.

Ryan: So, of course, you can probably guess what nest we’re gonna be kicking today based on the title, based on the material so far. So all I ask is you stick with us and you do so with an inclination orientation, a prioritization of truth, right?

Truth matters. Truth matters more than our culture would have you believe. Truth matters more than our desires and our feelings. We must be conformed to the truth. We don’t try to find truth to make us feel better about the things we already want. Instead, we let truth bear its weight on us, so-

Selena: Well, and in turn, when truth does bear its weight on us, and we do step into obedience rather than disobedience, there’s blessing, there’s promises, there’s fruitfulness, there’s all of that good stuff. So I would argue it’s better.

Ryan: Here we go.

Selena: And if you don’t know who we are, I’m Selena. This is my handsome husband, Ryan Frederick.

Ryan: Thank you. Needed that boost.

Selena: Yes. So Handsome.

Ryan: It’s been a rough couple of days just to be really candid in front of our listeners and viewers.

Selena: So pray for us. [laughs]

Ryan: Please pray for us. We know God is good. We’re trusting Him. We’re running to Him.

Selena: I don’t think anybody’s-

Ryan: But it’s very hard sometimes. Well, I’ll just say there it takes… is this right? It takes more faith at times. It always takes faith, but sometimes it feels like it takes more faith. It’s just some-

Selena: Some growing. There’s a lot of-

Ryan: There’s some family stuff going on and all… just anyway.

Selena: So Just pray for us. And if you want to support us in any way, join-

Ryan: Join the Fierce Fellowship. Sorry, I got really excited about that.

Selena: It’s okay.

Ryan: We’re in the Fierce Fellowship.

Selena: You can pray for us. Even if you’re not in the Fierce fellowship.

Ryan: Well… I’m kidding. [laughs]

Selena: But if you wanna join us and partner with us, go to There it is.

Ryan: But fiercemarriage is all one word. There’s not a big space between the two words.

Selena: Sorry.

Ryan: But yeah, that’s the way to get there. We’d love that. We’d appreciate that.

Selena: This is where we get some of our questions as well. Which today we do have a question from a husband. Legitimate question. Awesome. This is where we get the yoga pan question. It’s awesome. So I’m gonna have you read it-

Ryan: All right.

Selena: …because you’re the husband.

Ryan: This comes from Anon. I missed you, buddy. [Laughs] It says, “My wife is a CrossFit coach and athlete. I feel the clothes she wears at the gym are too revealing. She disagrees. She says they’re normal for that activity. In fairness, she’s dressed like most of the other women, and the clothes are what she’s comfortable in. I told her I feel disrespected that she dresses like that in front of other men. She asked if I really feel she’s being immodest or if I’m just jealous. I do feel jealous and I’m unsure if the way she dresses is wrong or if I’m just dealing with my own insecurity. How can I determine what’s right apart from my own feelings?”

Selena: There’s got a lot going on. And I think you have to be careful with tone. We’re taking some liberties with tone. But he could just be like, “Yeah, she disagrees and, you know, maybe I feel disrespected and she is asking questions.” Or it could be, you know-

Ryan: Well, you also have to-

Selena: …a little more malicious intent.

Ryan: So this husband took time to write this in. He crafted a very well-written paragraph.

Selena: He did. He did.

Ryan: You’d be surprised some of the paragraphs we get in terms of- [laughs]

Selena: Clarity.

Ryan: Clarity. This one is very clear.

Selena: Right.

Ryan: So that tells me, yeah, this… I think it could perhaps we even a bigger issue than this would have us believe in this husband’s heart and mind. So he wanted-

Selena: Maybe they’re scratching the surface here of some deeper heart issues, some heart motivations, heart orientations.

Ryan: Absolutely. The big kind of underlying question here, because he asked, he says, “I’m unsure if the way she dresses is wrong.” So what is right and wrong in terms of how we present ourselves, to use biblical language, in terms of how we adorn ourselves? And to what end?

Selena: Well, as a Christian, you are either attracting attention to ourselves or to God, right? We are either adorning ourselves, as you say, in ways that show our adoration for our Father, you know, knowing our place as children of God and this is the standard in which we dress for these reasons, which we’ll lay out in scripture here.

But it’s scripture is not like… it does say dress these ways, but it’s for a deeper reason. It is for the protection of the heart and the eyes, I think of men and women, right? Other believers. Because how I dress is gonna affect other people.

Ryan: Well, and it says something about you. And you’ve said that, but that’s… We get into what Paul wrote to Timothy, and Peter wrote to the early church. But there’s these deeper questions of what is how I adorned myself? What is that that [00:05:38] about? Not just me, but my God.

So we’re held accountable for that. What comes to mind when you were talking was John the Baptist in John 1. It says, you know, and the light was coming into the world, and the world did not overcome it and did not understand it. That was Christ. And then it said, on the scene appeared a man,—I’m using kind of paraphrase language—John. John the Baptist. And he said, “Behold, I’m not the light, but instead I’ve come to testify about the light.?

So he was making a very clear point that what he was there to do was a testimony of the one shining through him. Now, we’re not all John the Baptist, literally, of course. And he got to be that person in history. But in a very similar way, we are to be lights under the world, a salt, a light into the darkness. And that light is not our own. It is a light that is shining through us and from a source that is not us.

Selena: It’s interesting you bring up John the Baptist. His attire was noted, I think in the Bible, which is interesting.

Ryan: For its shabbiness. interesting. He dressed in camel hair or something?

Selena: Yeah, the locust.

Ryan: And honey.

Selena: And honey and honey, sorry. And there’s so healthy something to be said. So the husband’s questioning, you know, what is right and wrong, you know, am I just feeling insecure? Is that wrong to feel insecure and jealous as a husband towards his wife? We’ll get through some of that in just a minute.

But I think let’s take a minute to look at scripture and reflect on how the Bible would govern us in this situation. So 1 Timothy 2:8-10. You wanna read that?

Ryan: Sure. “I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.

And let’s read 1 Peter 3:1-4 and then we’ll go back and talk about it.

Selena: It affirms that, yeah.

Ryan: Do you wanna read that one?

Selena: Sure. “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

So we’re seeing some similar themes here. Some struggles that women deal with. Maybe it’s not as even a struggle, it’s just women of that time, they were… even today, women are adorned. Like women are the glory of man. They’re made beautiful. They’re the beauty and the delight that is brought into the home. A woman should be beautiful. And I mean that not just externally.

Ryan: Of course.

Selena: So there’s this tension of he’s saying like, don’t let your adorning, you know… it’s not literal is what I’m saying. You know, it was a sign of wealth. It was a sign of prosperity for women to have-

Ryan: He’s not talking about the braiding of the hair itself.

Selena: Right.

Ryan: He’s talking about what the hair braided represents-

Selena: What is it reflecting…?

Ryan: …a certain level of wealth, a certain level of status. And you said strictly it’s a status symbol. It’s like wearing a Rolex or driving a Maserati or whatever. It’s a status symbol. Real quickly, boom, baby.

Selena: Baby.

Ryan: So if you’re watching, a baby just appeared. We try to get this fit in during her nap, but her naps are-

Selena: Sometimes they wake up.

Ryan: Sometimes kids wake up and you can’t just power through. So here we are. I wanted to address this in this 1 Timothy passage is he’s talking about the heart issue like you’ve talked about. He’s talking about what is proper for women who profess godliness.

But one of the big questions that people raise is that this was just the context, right? This was specific to Paul talking to Timothy for Timothy’s specific context. It shouldn’t apply literally. Now, the reason I bring that up is because this is also where Paul talks about women should not preach, women should not… you know, there’s all these other-

Selena: You go further on down the passage.

Ryan: So the question is, is this universal or is it contextual? Now there’s clues in the text that tell us that it is universal, that we can look at what Paul’s saying and say it applies through all Christians, through all the time. It’s not just something that is for Timothy and his congregation there. He says, I desire them that every place… So immediately. We’re not just at Timothy’s church. We’re at “every place”. “…that men should pray.

Now, think about if we said that’s contextual. Well, men should only pray, but men should pray. But that’s only what Paul was saying to Timothy for his men. Men shouldn’t really… Now of course we have other passages that tell us to pray. So that would be a pretty weak argument to make. But you start to see how ridiculous that sounds.

Men should pray lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling. And then this tricky word “likewise” or “in this way” that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel. So I just want to dispel that lie, that this is strictly about braided hair, gold pearls, a costly attire in Timothy’s church. It’s about the heart behind the braided hair, and it’s also about Timothy’s church, but it’s also about all churches.

Selena: And I think it’s the reflection of the heart, right? We see this affirmed in 1 Peter, like we just read. Clearly there is a struggle with appearance and what sort of message Christian women, godly women should be sending to those outside of her marriage and outside of her home. You know, the Christian life, I mean, it should be a pouring out of what is already happening, what the Lord is already doing from on the inside. Right?

So the Bible outlines that the Lord values and treasures what He values and treasures in godly women, like the hidden person of their heart, the soul of the woman. Perishable beauty is a gentle and quiet spirit. These are precious to the Lord. So are they precious to me? They should be. But are they? And if they’re not, how do I get to that place of them being those things.

Also things like submission and respect and modesty. Like, we’re gonna talk about that. Ephesians 5, everyone knows it. The Bible is very clear in its commandments and its teachings about marriage, roles, covenant, how to love one another selflessly, how to give oneself up for the other.

The whole Christian life is one of submission, right? First to God. And then for the wife, it’s submission to her own husband. Because it’s in that submission where fruitfulness is born, where the purpose of marriage comes full circle and is complete.

Without submission we don’t have fruitfulness. Without submission we don’t have headship, we don’t have this beautiful covenant that God created. Ephesians 5 outlines submission of a wife to her own husband. She’s to respect her husband, right? And the husband though is to love his wife.

Ryan: So what does this have to do with yoga pants, modesty, CrossFit-

Selena: Well, modesty-

Ryan: …a husband who feels jealous about his wife.

Selena: Modesty has to do with respect for yourself, for others, and for the sake of this conversation for her husband. What you wear communicates things, whether you are aware of it or not. And I think as Christians, we should be aware of the messages of what we’re communicating clearly, right? We shouldn’t be overly concerned with our external wear, but we should be more concerned with the things of the heart, which is what I think the verses in Peter and Titus were getting at.

Ryan: Can I ask you something?

Selena: Yeah.

Ryan: Is this something that you think women are uniquely challenged with? Meaning the adorning being external?

Selena: No. Because I think, like we talked about, there’s different reasons for why we adorn ourselves.

Ryan: Sure.

Selena: It could be for men too. Are you dressing in a certain way to draw attention to yourself? Are you trying to feel superior to others in how you dress? Are you trying to get jealousy or insight luster? Are you dressing the way you’re dressing out of idolatry? Like, what are the things that you’re worshiping?

So we have to check our hearts and maybe even change your clothes because what we wear should communicate and demonstrate our understanding and our affections for the Lord. Right?

Ryan: And that’s so huge because, if you hear this podcast and you just hear, man, Fredericks are a bunch of legalists, they say, I need to change my clothes, otherwise I’m not loving the Lord. Right? If you hear that-

Selena: You have not heard it right. [Laughs]

Ryan: But I’m thinking, okay, so I’m thinking about… so I have started upping my game on Sunday mornings. I’m not just wearing T-shirts and jeans. I found a great shop that does these wool suits that are-

Selena: Gonna be really hot in summer. [laughs]

Ryan: Yes. Actually, I’ve heard that it could go either way. But anyway. But as I’m doing that, I could see how if that got outta hand and someone said, You know what? You’re doing that out of legalism. You’re doing that out of pride. You’re doing that out of wanting to adorn your external man, right? Now, if my orientation is toward the Lord, God, I only wanna honor you with what I wear. I only want to have a heart that is aligned with you with what I wear, that’s gonna mean that I need to be in God’s word. I need to understand the heart of His word is not just…

So I could take that two ways. I could say, I’m gonna reject that. I’m gonna do what I want. I don’t believe it. Or I could humbly submit myself to it and say, “Is that true? And actually look inward and say, is this true? Lord, help me. Am I doing this outta pride?”

Selena: Search me and know me.

Ryan: Sure. Yeah. “Show me why I am doing this because I wanna make sure my motivation is honoring to you.” Now, that sounds all fine and good while I’m talking about a guy wearing a suit on a Sunday. Now talk to a-

Selena: A girl wearing yoga pants to the gym.

Ryan: …wearing yoga pants on a Monday afternoon. Are you willing to put those yoga pants on the altar and say, Lord, search my heart.

Selena: Because if we’re defensive and we’re already saying, you know, well, it’s comfortable, it’s functional, everybody wears it-

Ryan: Or it’s not my job to keep guys’ eyes from looking. That’s what you hear.

Selena: And I would disagree with that. I think that women have been given a beautiful body that men want to look. Like God has wired us in these ways. And so, yes, I believe that women do have a bit of a responsibility to steward their bodies well, to dress modestly and respectfully. And you can discern wife what that means. It doesn’t always mean a floor-length address or something there, head coverings or anything. Like, you need to discern what that means. But showing off the goods to everyone just because everyone else is doing it and it’s more functional are not gonna stand before the Lord and His word. They’re not gonna be the exception, right?

Ryan: That shoots right to the core of this question the husband’s writing in and the wife’s response meaning that, okay, both of you, are you trying to have reverence for God and obedience toward God and bring glory to Christ’s name with this question, with the issue question?

Selena: To others when you go to the gym, to each other in your covenant.

Ryan: If you say, that has to be my first motivation, that’s gonna drive how you respond to this. Because if that question is off on the side somewhere and it’s kind of like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But really, like, no one cares. You’re just being a prude or you’re being jealous. Really, it doesn’t… No. Like, bring the question in the front and say, Am I trying to honor the Lord with this area of my life?

And I think it becomes really hard to make a case for all of the typical reasons why people would justify this. Now, like we said at the outset, this absolutely is a golden calf in our society.

Selena: Yeah, absolutely.

Ryan: I expect to get backlash. I expect the YouTube comments, I expect the bad ratings, whatever, because people think that they can’t think categorically. They wanna think that you’re just trying to be legalistic. I wanna read this passage that you’ve got on Got Questions.

“At the core of dressing modestly is reverence for God. Rather than seek to garner attention through appearance, godly women are to seek to glorify God. Of course, this same principle also applies to men. Both women and men are called to honor God in all aspects of their lives, including in how they dress.”

Selena: Yes. So, you know, we’re looking at how does how we dress affect our spouse, like our husband, and then how does it affect others believer or unbeliever, right? Because how you dress is gonna communicate. It is a testament to what you believe. So are you, wife, aware of how your choice of imperil affects others?

1 Corinthians 10:31-33 says, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks, or the church of God— even as I try to please everyone in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved.”

Again, you are not Christ or salvation, but you are a reflection of Him and you are covered by His blood. So are you living in a way, in every little choice and decision that you make that reflects the goodness and the glory of God? Again, we’re trying to lift our eyes to the eternal. Right? We’re trying to-

Ryan: Do you… Sorry.

Selena: Go ahead.

Ryan: You’re totally right. You wrote the rundown for this episode. What are the solutions? Because you had mentioned a few times, it doesn’t mean you have to wear like floor length skirts or X, Y, or Z-

Selena: Right. Because I-

Ryan: Where would we draw the line in our day and age if a wife is saying, yeah, you’re right, you know, maybe I should talk, think about this.

Selena: I mean, you can look anywhere you shop for clothing… well, almost anywhere. But if you type in, you know, even modest workout wear, active wear… I mean, I have shirts that cover you down the rear end and they’re comfortable, they’re functional. Like, I can do everything that I could do even without a shirt that’s a bit longer than that. I’ve also had friends who are CrossFitters and they’ll wear their pants, but they’ll wear shorts over the pants-

Ryan: Like soccer shorts or something?

Selena: Yeah. I get chafing. I get that whole, like, you want functional, you wanna be able to focus on what you’re doing and not how you’re feeling in your clothing, right? But I want to also bless my husband and bless my lord, ultimately in how I dress, you know, the words that come outta my mouth. Everything that I do, I want it to be a reflection of the Lord.

You can look up activewear that is more modest. There are more and more companies that are putting that type of activewear out there. You could Google anything like that if you’re really concerned about that.

Ryan: You’ll oftentimes just throw around the house. You’re comfortable around the house. You’re not worried about this issue at the house. And you’ll throw a sweatshirt around your waist.

Selena: I’ll just tie a sweatshirt around my waist if I-

Ryan: The mailman comes, or you need to go outside for some reason.

Selena: I own yoga pants. So there, internet. Just have a heyday and fire. Just go. [laughs]

Ryan: On that note, not all quote yoga pants, which yoga, that’s a whole different issue-

Selena: Considered equal. Right.

Ryan: They’re not all considered equal. Two of them are intense. Have we talked about that-

Selena: Very form-fitting?

Ryan: We’ve recorded episode twice.

Selena: Well, I don’t know that we should get too far into that, but yes, we’re all aware of how tight and fitting they are.

Ryan: Oh my goodness. It doesn’t even look like pants sometimes. That’s what I’m trying to say. That to me is like, why would you…? Unless you’re trying to elicit some sort of reaction in a man or otherwise.

Selena: To answer this husband’s question, we said that I think that there is a healthy level of jealousy that a husband can have for his wife, to not share her body with other men in any way, shape, or form. So there’s a healthy level of jealousy saying, “Hey, I don’t feel comfortable with this. I feel disrespected.”

To me if he says “Disrespected, like that trumps anything else because he doesn’t ever say that.” Because we have worked hard to get to this position, and the Lord has been gracious in opening our eyes to what’s honoring to one another. How can we be selfless and love one another?

But the fact that the husband is saying he does feel jealous, I think that’s okay. Does it determine whether what she’s wearing is right or wrong? I think partially yes. And maybe he is insecure, but what does that matter if they’re in a marriage together, she’s his wife, he said, “Hey, I feel disrespected. I feel like this is too revealing. Can we talk about options for not doing this right? Because it’s clearly not about the clothing, but it’s about the clothing, right?

Ryan: Well, yeah. The clothing or it’s precipitating the problem.

Selena: Well, and she’s-

Ryan: So the question is, is his jealousy, we’re gonna use the word that he used… So we have a jealous God. He doesn’t want us going after other gods. So this is not like, oh, it’s automatically a sin. No, there’s a righteous jealousy for what is right, good, and true, especially when it comes to marriage and a man and his wife and a wife and her man.

So is his jealousy reasonable, is the question. And is his feelings of disrespect reasonable? On the far end of the spectrum, if a husband demands respect in a certain way or says, “I feel disrespected when you’re not wearing a dress at the gym,” you know, well, is that reasonable? So there’s gonna be a window here that’s reasonable. What?

Selena: I’m just thinking, is it coming from a place of love and concern, not a place of control?

Ryan: I can say, I know how gym guys are, gym bros if you will. I’ve been to enough gyms. I’ve seen enough guys, I’ve lifted with enough guys. I know they’re not all like this. But there are a good bit of, you know, guys that are creeps and are objectifiers and are out for no good.

So if you’re going to a gym and you’re wearing something that I think is… what’s the word? You’re taking the stake to the meat market. [both laughs]

Selena: Okay. Go ahead.

Ryan: I’m thinking like that piece of meat is gonna be viewed as such and, you know, the buyers are gonna be out in droves. Well, I don’t want that. That’s not healthy. It’s so weird to talk about that with you because you wouldn’t want that either.

Selena: It’s not only not healthy, but it’s not God-honoring. And as Christians, we are submitted to the Lord, first and foremost. So if the Lord’s my authority, He’s my king, He’s my savior, He gave His all for me, by George, I’m gonna give up those yoga pants in the gym then, you know. It feels like such a small thing to give up.

Ryan: Well, I can hear it where folks will say-

Selena: I know.

Ryan: Did God really say that I have to give up the yoga pants? Because I don’t really trust what the Fredericks are saying. I’m not following their logic on this. I don’t have the same convictions.

Selena: What did we say the first sin was?

Ryan: Did God really say that?

Selena: Not deception, but pride. [laughs]

Ryan: But here’s what God did really say. He did really say in His word that a woman’s beauty, her adorning should not be external, it should be internal. That women should dress in a way that is becoming and befitting their godliness. So He did say those things. Yes. And so now it’s between you and wife, you and your husband, husband, you and your wife and the Holy Spirit to let that text read you. Say, is your adorning external? Right. Well, but I’m also a good person. Okay. That’s not what we’re talking about.

Selena: That’s a whole nother conversation. [Laughs]

Ryan: We’re talking about your adorning in this. Is it befitting of a woman who is on a trajectory toward godliness? And then we can bring in this whole can of worms: are you causing a brother to stumble? I don’t believe all women are responsible for all men’s eyes in their thought lives. That’s not the case. But I think godly women have a call to not contribute to it.

Selena: I don’t feel like it’s loving my brothers in Christ well to-

Ryan: Sure.

Selena: …put any sort of temptation. Plus, I don’t wanna share that with anyone but you. So the whole conversation that we’ve sort of been unfolding here is it really is about loving your spouse. It really is about modesty being a form of respect for yourself, for your God, for your husband, for your spouse, for others around you.

So we need to not only just like take our heart out and say, Lord, search and know me, examine me. But we also need to lift our eyes every decision that we make today. What we wear, what activities we engage in, who we hang out with, what the words that we speak. You know, everything’s gonna be accounted for. And so, do they all reflect our beliefs about God? Do they reflect the love that we have for our savior?

I pray that they line up right. Every day I pray God, like I repent of my sins. I take the pardon and the assurance. I thank God for His grace. But our choices for things as small and seemingly meaningless as what pants we wear, they should be anchored in our desire to glorify the Lord above all else and for us to fix our eyes on Him and the eternal us.

Remember Proverbs 31:30, right? It gives us this wisdom. Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting. But a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Ryan: Amen. Amen. So if you are in this situation, or if this is you who you know, husband, wife, this is your question, there are clear boundaries around what we are to wear and how we are to adorn ourselves. Don’t let your own desires and biases trump the truth, is what I’m trying to say. Let the truth be the truth. And by the power of the Holy Spirit come under you.

Selena: Humble underneath it.

Ryan: And let it change you. Let it change what you love. Let it change what you want. Let it change how you act. Let it change how you reason. Let the truth change you in this area. And it’s so funny. It seems like we’re being so careful with this, but like, they’re just pants. [laughs] They’re just pants at the end of the day. To me, it’s not like we’re called to cut your left arm off. So, keeps some perspective in that process.

If you’re listening to this, you made it this far, we never want to end an episode without telling you at least a path forward to understanding and placing your faith in Christ. We want you to be a Christian. We wanna call you brother. We wanna call you sister.

And the only way we can do that is if you have placed your faith in Christ, you have a saving faith in Him, believe that He is God in the flesh who adorned the flesh, that He might live the perfect life. He died the sinner’s death. He didn’t stay death, but He was raised again on the third day and now reigns on the right hand of the Father in glory as king.

And He said, Those who believe in Me, who repent and believe in Me have eternal life. Well, because His righteousness has purchased our salvation. It’s not our own goodness that gets us into heaven. It’s Christ’s perfect life that buys us our salvation and pays the price for our sin.

That’s the gospel. That’s the good news. We want you to hear it. We want you to believe it. We want you to love Jesus. So to do that, find a friend who loves Jesus and ask them, how do I get to know Jesus? And say, let’s read our Bibles together. Okay? Get started there. Find a church that preached outta the Bible.

If you have a hard time with either of those things, you can’t find them, go to this website. It’s We pray that that blesses you.

Let’s pray. Lord Jesus, Father God, we love You. Thank You for Your word that is so instructive. Not just this area, but it’s every area of life. I pray that You’d help these husbands and these wives listening to this to be discerning, to be courageous in their obedience to Your word, to slough off whatever cultural baggage they have picked up to drop it. And instead to pick up your truth, to let it bear its full weight in their life and its full beautiful weight in their life, that it might transform their hearts from the very core, all the way out, and even into the ways that they adorn themselves. Lord, we pray this in your precious Son’s name. Amen.

Selena: Amen.

Ryan: Thank you again for joining us. If you’d like to partner with us and join The Fierce Fellowship, we would be privileged, honored, delighted, enjoyed… Enjoyed? Overjoyed.

Selena: Overjoyed.

Ryan: Go to Other than that, this episode of the Fierce Marriage Podcast is—

Selena: In the can.

Ryan: We’ll see you again, Lord willing, in about seven days. So, until next time—

Selena: Stay fierce.


We’d love your help!

If our ministry has helped you, we’d be honored if you’d pray about partnering with us. Those who do can expect unique interactions, behind-the-scenes access, and random benefits like freebies, discount codes, and exclusive content. More than anything, you become a tangible part of our mission of pointing couples to Christ and commissioning marriages for the gospel. Become a partner today.

Partner with Fierce Marriage on Patreon

You Might Also Like