It’s important to make a sharp distinction between love and lust in marriage. When a husband and wife love each other’s souls, time and aging only strengthen their love. Lust has the opposite effect. Understanding the differences between the two will help you address toxic tendencies directly. Here are a few key distinctions between lust and love: Lust is selfish, love is selfless. Lust is…
3 Ways I’m Pursuing My Wife & How it Multiplies Our Love
As a follower of Christ and a husband, I’m learning what it means to truly love my wife “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Eph 5:25). That oft-quoted marriage passage is chock full of depth. Most days I find it’s charge unbearable. I’m a man… a human man. I sin and I have selfish tendencies. How can I possibly love my…
Identifying & Ending Cycles of Harmful Behavior in Marriage
I watched a video a while back that completely wrecked me. It’s a message delivered by Francis Chan where he talks about the parable of the sower. As he explained Jesus’ words, one phrase hit me like a ton of bricks: “Don’t assume you are the good soil.” If you spend any time online, you’ll read dozens of Christian pick-me-up phrases daily; bite-size sermons condensed to…
Devotion: 4 Ways to “Design Your Time”
True quality time is becoming a lost art. There are more opportunities for wasting time than at any other period in history: smart phones, social media, streaming entertainment, 100s of cable channels, you name it. Paul urges us to use our time wisely: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days…
Video: How to Fight Familiarity in Your Marriage
When you spend your life getting to know the same person, you get the awesome privilege to know them more deeply than anyone else on the planet – and they you. However, familiarity in your marriage is a double edged sword. If we’re not careful we can become too familiar with each other which can cause problems. These issues can range from forgetting to extend small common…
Devotion: The 3 Proximities of Intimacy
Intimacy builds with every interaction. It happens with each glance, small touch, kind word, and inside joke you quietly laugh about when you’re around others. If you’re only intimate before and during sex, you’re missing out…There’s so much more! True intimacy is extreme closeness, and closeness only happens with proximity. About this Article This post is an excerpt from our 30 day couple’s devotional, Two…
The 4 Clear Priorities for Love in Marriage
Priorities are and will continue to be one of the biggest issues in every marriage. When your priorities are out of whack, it hurts. And when they’re properly ordered, everything just feels right. We posted this simple reminder on our Facebook page recently. It seemed to resonate well: This list and its order are nothing new. But why do reminders like these continue to resonate…
Devotion: Keep the House, Toss the Bulb
We live in a “throw away” culture. If we’re not careful this attitude can permeate our lives in areas that matter most, marriage included. The quote in the image below (author unknown) is powerful because it reminds us that we mustn’t be too quick to discard our whole marriage when parts of it simply need renewal, removal, or replacement. Otherwise, the cost is too great…
Reflections On Hardship in Marriage
Over the years (particularly on social media) I’ve seen arguments back and forth about a wealth and prosperity “gospel” and how it aligns (or doesn’t align) with the message of Christ. As I read through some of the articles, I started thinking about how these conflicting messages affect marriage. In John 10:10, Jesus talks about “life to the full” or “abundant life.” What exactly does that mean for…
Two Updates: a Baby and a Book
Ok, it’s been longer than usual between posts. My apologies for that. I promise our excuses are good… We’ve learned to accept scarcity on the blog-front for two major reasons: We’re having a baby any day now and Selena feels the full effect of being 38 weeks pregnant! We’ve been focused on finishing up our new couple’s devotional, Two as One. So, this is an update of…