August 28, 2023

Dealing with Marital Doubt, The 3 Pillars, and Broken Bulbs

ONE Thought (from us)

It’s understandable for those who sometimes doubt their marriage. Thoughts like “What if I was too young?” or “What if I married the wrong person?” are common for those dealing with marital tumult. These questions, whether their askers know it or not, drive right to the heart of whether or not they understand what we consider to be the three foundational pillars of marriage:

  1. Covenant. God relates to us covenantally and he calls spouses to do the same. Why? For your good and for his glory.
  2. Love. Are feelings how we define love? Or is it more? According to Scripture, love is many things but feelings isn’t one of them.
  3. The Gospel. Marriage is a reflection of God’s covenantal, unconditional love in Christ. If we have a low view of the gospel, we’ll have a low view of marriage.

So, if you or someone you know is struggling with marital doubt, the best place to run is into the covenantal, loving arms of our gracious God. Seek to understand how he has covenantally loved you (what if God had doubts about saving you?), then put that understanding to work in how you love your spouse covenantally. The beauty is, you’re not alone. God will guide, help, and instruct you every step along the way.

“I will establish my covenant with you, and you shall know that I am the LORD, that you may remember and be confounded, and never open your mouth again because of your shame, when I atone for you for all that you have done, declares the Lord GOD.”
(Ezekiel 16:62)


ONE Quote (from another)

“Marriage is like a house. When a light bulb goes out you don’t buy a new house, you fix the bulb.”
– Anonymous


ONE Question (for you)

What is one clear, specific way you can love your spouse covenantally today?


Note: Be sure to watch or listen to this week’s podcast episode to get the full discussion. Also, if you’re looking to grow closer through the actions of love (and prayer), we have a perfect resource for you: The Pray and Pursuit Book Bundle.

Much love and stay fierce!

Ryan & Selena Frederick
Founders of Fierce Marriage