Sacred Simmering

One of the great challenges of sexual fulfillment in the twenty-first century is that there’s so little time and energy left over to enjoy sex. I get sympathetic laughs in my talks whenever I mention “hotel sex.” Two of the main reasons hotel sex (or vacation sex) creates such a different experience are time and energy. Most of us who are older than thirty will…

Married with Kids? Two Dynamics to Watch Out For

What do you do in marriage when the rival for your spouse’s love and affection is one of your own children? In fact, one of the biggest tests of a marriage occurs when kids start arriving. Raising kids can draw a couple together like nothing else or it can rip the two of you apart with fury. Here are two dynamics to watch out for. …

A Prayer That Left Me Gloriously Ruined

Few ideas have affected our marriage more than this one: marriage is more about holiness than happiness. This isn’t to say marriage isn’t happy at all, just that holiness is the higher priority. How has this focus changed us? Well, if and when happiness conflicts with holiness, holiness must win. When we’ve gone through rough patches together, there were times when both Selena and I thought we’d…