Accountability, For Men, For Women, Love

Ministering Out of Your Marriage

Being married = inevitable challenges DAILY!

One of the primary reasons we wrote this blog was to offer help to others who are also walking out this adventure called marriage.

We’re not alone, and we don’t have to feel that way.

God is always sharpening and growing us to become more like Him.

One thing we can’t discount, as Christian married couples, is the fact that God is doing something IN you, and is always looking to do something THROUGH you and your spouse.


For Ryan and I, we knew that writing this blog was an issue of obedience.

Ever since we started dating (summer of 2000; July 24th to be exact) Ryan and I have felt like God’s grace has continually covered our relationship.

It’s out of His grace that we are able to minister and fulfill the Great Commission of going and making disciples.

Now, maybe you’re wondering about how the Great Commission and marriage are connected? Great question.

Marriage + The Great Commission

I’m in a women’s small group/bible study and we’re reading the book Multiply by Francis Chan.

This past week page 56 hit me like a freight train about how we can disciple others out of our marriages.

Go back a few pages and Chan teaches us that (p.31) “…making disciples is far more than a program. It is the mission of our lives.”

Being a Christian is two-fold. It means that (1) you’ve accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, and (2) now you’re living a life that fulfills the Great Commission which is to go and make more disciples (or followers) of Christ.

What Do We Have To Offer?

Too many times we’re fooled into thinking that we don’t really have anything to offer others.

Maybe you feel like you argue too much or, when you think about it, ‘What do we really have to offer?’

The truth is that God is bigger than our problems and the gospel–the GOOD NEWS is that it’s NOT about people who have it all together. (Praise God!)

It’s about a Father reconciling His people back to Him through the death of His One and only Son Jesus.

In other words, being able to minister/help people does not and should not come from your own ability and talents, but from the power of what Jesus has done in your life, more specifically in your marriage. He SAVED us!

Opportunities in the storms

Trials are inevitable and cyclic.

You’re either in the middle of one, at the end of one, or about to enter one. They are messy. And offering to “help” others in the midst of their challenges in’t easy, but we are all called to help.

Francis Chan says it best, (pg. 56)

“You are called to encourage, challenge and help the other Christians in your life, and they are called to do the same for you. If you wait until all of your own issues are gone before helping others, it will never happen. This is a trap that millions have fellen into, not realizing that our own sanctification happens as we minister to others.”

Write It Down.

What is it that you’re going through in your marriage right now? Maybe it’s an addiction (pornography, alcohol, spending money you don’t have), or maybe it’s dealing with infidelity? Perhaps you argue all the time about everything — Without a doubt, someone else is facing or about to face that same trial.

First of all, have you and your spouse brought the situation to God? Have you invited Him into the situation and sought after His wisdom?

Secondly, as you’ve walked out this situation with God, what have you and your spouse learned through this situation?


It’s important to cherish these moments and miracles where God brought healing, restoration and redemption.

Being reminded of what God has done in our marriages is important and should not only be cherished, but shared.

Don’t ever discount the challenges you face, no matter how big or small.

It’s highly possible that you might be facing something in order to help minister to someone the God brings into your life.

Question: Write down a challenge that you and your spouse have faced with the Lord and ask God how you should share it and with whom.

(Photo by Cheval Photos)

Have you heard of the The 31-Day Pursuit Challenge?

Every marriage begins with passion, purpose, and pursuit, but few stay that way. That’s why we wrote Husband in Pursuit and Wife in Pursuit Together, they make what we’re calling the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge. Couples are encouraged take the challenge together. We’re already starting to hear stories of transformed marriages! Are you up for the challenge?

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