Sex is one of those things that has the power to deeply connect a couple, or devastate them. In the context of marriage, sex is designed by God for edification, beauty, and pleasure. And with it’s prevalence in pop-culture, healthy sex is largely ill-defined and incompletely portrayed. As married couples, it’s important to conciously evolve and improve our sex lives to better meet the needs of each other.
This is part 2 of our “Tips for Awesome Sex” series. If you haven’t yet, I encourage you to read part 1.
Healthy sex is a vital part of a healthy marriage – it’s one tangible difference between our marital relationships and every other relationship we have on this planet!
With that said, it’s important that we treat it like the other aspects of our marriages (communication, etc) when it comes to growing and improving. Getting better (healthier) in the area of sex takes practice, thoughtful consideration, and a conscious desire to meet your spouse’s needs right where they’re at.
Here are three more tips for awesome sex in your marriage:
Light is alright
Sex isn’t always a cinematic & passionate affair – and that’s alright! It’s ok to be light-hearted in the bedroom, so long as each of you share in the experience.
Laughter is ok, talking is good, and joy is a natural part of the experience.
Ok, so the definition of “adventurous” is a little tough to nail down. The point here is that you don’t have to keep it the same. Sex should be monogamous, not monotonous! Mix things up a bit! Think of ways to surprise your spouse in the bedroom.
Guys: maybe get off of work early to set up something extra romantic before your wife gets home. Sprinkle rose petals, crack open a bottle of the bubbly, and light a candle. Think something up that will really set the mood.
Gals: husbands are pretty predictable in this area…in other words, you can’t go wrong. Think of ways you can surprise him through your attire, or timing, or even location. I’ll leave the rest to you…
Think of ways you can break the norm in your marriage and keep things interesting. In all things, just make sure you keep it edifying and uplifting.
Keep it classy
I’ve heard justification for talking “dirty” in the sack as a means to facilitate arousal. I would add the caveat that we should remember who we’re talking to – a daughter of the King (your bride), or his son (your husband).
It’s ok to talk through sex – just don’t be crass. Keeping it classy means you’re treating your husband or wife with the utmost dignity. This doesn’t mean that only PG rated discussions are allowed, just use discernment, and keep the edification of your spouse at the top of your priority list.
Sex is awesome because of the connection it facilitates. There’s really nothing like it. Like any area in marriage, we need to purposefully improve it. Make sure you and your spouse spend time discussing what awesome sex is in your relationship. With grace and a LOT of practice, you’ll be the best lifetime sex partners either of you could ever ask for!
Have you heard of the The 31-Day Pursuit Challenge?
Every marriage begins with passion, purpose, and pursuit, but few stay that way. That’s why we wrote Husband in Pursuit and Wife in Pursuit Together, they make what we’re calling the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge. Couples are encouraged take the challenge together. We’re already starting to hear stories of transformed marriages! Are you up for the challenge?