Challenges, For Women

Willingness As a Wife

Maybe it’s a first-born child thing, or maybe it’s just me getting older, but I’ve become more aware of how unwilling I tend to be with my husband.

When I was in my early 20s I’d overhear older women say something to their husband to the effect of, “Oh no! I am never doing that! (fill in the blank with something adventurous and completely out of one’s comfort zone)”

I remember thinking to myself, I’ll never be like that. I will always be young, adventurous and excited about new things. 

Unintentionally quoting Justin Bieber, never say never.

It wasn’t until I started reading Psalm 51 (verse 12 specifically) that I was really convicted about my latest behavior.

“Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.”

(Psalm 51:12 ESV)

Self-Inventory Time

Doing a personal inventory/week in review, and thank you to the loving, kind and true words of my husband, I admittedly knew that I had been unwilling, a little negative and complainey (yep, I’m making that word up for now), and unwilling to be spontaneous and fun.

For us personally, Ryan has a bucket-list dream to live on a sail boat and explore the Caribbean  Islands. When he told me this, my stomach turned and I immediately thought we were going to need to look at sail boats that weekend. Needless to say, I was very UNWILLING.

However, after a clarifying conversation, he simply needed me to be “ok” with the idea and not nestle into another idea of living in a comfortable home for the next 50 years. (That’s just the man I married! I love him!)

Ladies, our men need us to go on adventures with them!

Maybe it’s going on a hike when you don’t really feel like it, or maybe you need to bring sexy back when your husband is seeking you out and you’re “too tired.”

Selfless love and a willing spirit are necessary for a fulfilling marriage.

Yes, there may be moments where you’ll have to give more of yourself by doing something that wasn’t planned or on your monthly calendar, but life is too short to live predictably and comfortably.

Jesus: Our Greatest Example

Jesus is our ultimate example of selfless love and a willing spirit.

Pretty sure he wasn’t gunning for the humiliation and pain of the cross.

However, he loved us…so authentically, so deeply, and so selflessly.

His willingness to face death, because he loved us, is evident in his beautiful words in the Garden of Gethsemane,

(Luke 22:41-42 ESV) “And he (Jesus) withdrew from them about a stone’s throw away, and knelt down to pray, saying, ‘Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.’ “

“Nevertheless”

No doubt Jesus could’ve walked away from God’s redemption plan for all of humanity, but he didn’t.

He knew his purpose and he loved us.

There is a reason why marriage is compared to the relationship between Jesus and the Church (body of believers); because Christ died and gave himself up for us.

Again, not referring to sail boat purchasing and exploring, but what I am saying is, wives, we are called to love and respect our husbands and part of loving them, is being their adventure partner in life.

We can sacrifice a little bit of comfort and go on that camping trip they’ve been begging us to go on for the last few months. Who knows, maybe you’ll enjoy it!

To boil it all down, let’s as women, BE the loving, adventurous, supportive and respecting wife and follow the example of Christ: selfless and sacrificial love.

Question: What is something you’ve been putting off doing that your husband has been asking you to do with him for awhile now?

[Image by Cheval Photos]

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