Nothing replaces quality, focused time with your spouse. There are no substitutes and no shortcuts. We’re learning and relearning this concept in our marriage. Whenever Selena and I allow our time together to be eroded by life’s chaos and busyness, our marriage suffers. How? We’re impatient with each other Sex is infrequent and/or insincere Frustrations mount as grace runs dry We’re increasingly inconsiderate of one…
4 Ways to Prove to Your Spouse You Love Them (Part 2)
In my previous post, we covered the first two ways you can prove your love to your spouse: transparency/honesty, and loving them when they’re unloveable.* If you haven’t yet, I recommend quickly clicking back to give it a glance (it’s reasonably short), as it sets the stage for the series. Naturally this post will continue with parts 3 and 4 of the series, so let’s…
4 Ways to Prove to Your Spouse You Love Them (Part 1)
This Valentine’s Day couples young and old will strive to prove their love via candy, poems, songs, flowers, and helium balloons. It’s funny though, do these things actually do anything to convince our spouses of our love? Yes and no. If your marriage is healthy, Valentine’s Day gestures will extend an already present sentiment during a festive time of year – which is great! If…
5 Habits That Will Instantly Transform Your Marriage
The secret is out, there is no pill or potion that will make your marriage instantly better. Although, I suppose if there was such a remedy it would sell like organic mustache wax at a hipster convention. Being that a potion isn’t available, Selena and I have found that if we keep these few habits in place, our married life is ten times more enjoyable…
Video: John Piper, Tim Keller, and D.A. Carson on Sustaining the Marriage Covenant
“Sustaining the marriage covenant” is flowery language for simply “sticking together”. Selena and I have a saying: “There is no Plan B in our marriage.” We have no backup plan or escape clause. This mentality has helped us stick together in simple but profound ways. In the absence of a backup plan, each spouse seeks reconciliation instead of relief. We both understand that we have…
Video: 12 Stages of a Proper Car Fight
We’ve all had plenty of fights… especially fights in the car. It’s become a bit of a joke for Selena and I, whenever we’re headed out on a road trip or a mini-getaway, we almost always have to spend the first hour “detoxing” from latent and yet-to-be-communicated frustrations. Our longer car rides usually start very pleasant and peaceful, much like a pot of water on…
We had a baby! What we’re learning about marriage in the first week of being parents
We’ve been pretty quiet on the blog lately, and for good reason. We had a little girl on December 1st! I wanted to take some time and share explicitly with you (because we love our FM community), and to process through a few things we’re already learning about what it means to be married and parents simultaneously. Many of our readers have been parents for…
My Wife Doesn’t Complete Me
As much as I want to echo Mr. Maguire, I can’t. Selena doesn’t complete me, and nor do I complete her. “You complete me” is a famous line, said during the romantic crux of Jerry Maguire, a mid-90s ‘dramedy’ blockbuster. Since then, phrases like this one and “you had me at hello” have become comic relief staples for many “bromances” and lighthearted Friday night movie-quote sessions.…
20 Simple Axioms for Marriage
Sometimes the simplest epiphanies have the most profound impact. I’ve found these tiny axioms to be helpful in keeping us on point in our marriage. We’ve written a few posts that reinforce some of these (linked below), but in every case they’ve helped us keep the important things first.
7 Habits to Maintain Your Integrity When Traveling
Traveling is risky business. While it’s physically safe to travel, being away from home poses unique risks to your marriage if your character and integrity are weak. In fact, you’ll face the temptations and integrity-compromising situations I’ll be discussing in everyday life, but during solo travel they’re much more apparent. Traveling is an escape of sorts. You’re whisked away on a plane to a faraway…