We’ve had a quiet spell on the blog, this post explains why. In short, things are changing for us and just to clear the air, we’re not pregnant (that we know of!).
Change is tough. Well, usually it’s tough. Change means that whatever you’re used to, comfortable with, and reasonably good at must now be different. The thing about change is that it must happen – you simply cannot avoid it if you want progress. As it turns out, we’re not immune.
Selena and I are in a season of change that has us both excited and trembling.
As I write this, our earthly possessions are jammed in the back of an old 15′ U-haul truck. Towing behind said truck, is our silver Prius riding low (also filled to the brim) on a rented two-wheel car dolly. On top of the Prius is a cargo rack, also filled. Hanging off the back of the Prius is our bike rack with two modestly used bicycles.
Selena and I are feeling closer than ever despite this curiously ambiguous journey we’re on.
Currently, I’m sitting in a coffee shop pilfering free wifi and recovering from a 36 hour white-knuckling road trip accompanied by our two dogs and a fish named Ollie. I’m pecking away on my laptop, mixing work with writing this post.
Selena flew ahead of me with Dela, and she’s close by tending to our little herd (at her mom’s house with her other two dogs, four total).
We’re currently displaced and we don’t know the next ten steps… but we do know at least one.
Why the change?
On a deep level, change must happen periodically if you’re seeking to grow. God changes us like no other while He Himself remains completely, utterly consistent. He transforms us, refines us, molds us, and purifies us – why? Because He loves us.
He calls us into and out of places and purposes for the same reason – because He loves us. He changes us according to His grand purpose, which ultimately is to know and be known by Him.
Being known and knowing God compels us to glorify him, honor Him, and obey Him – not to earn His love but because of His love. Being known by God and experiencing His grace changes us.
We’ll also contend that marriage is one of His primary ways of changing us. Marriage is at the core of God’s plan for humanity, from the individual to the family to societal flourishing. Marriage is one of God’s biggest ideas.
Get to the point – so what’s changing?
We’ve spent the past 5 years in Palm Desert, CA. We thought we were going there for our reasons, but as it turns out, God took us there for reasons all His own. This blog is one of those reasons, as well as getting us repaired and healthy enough to stumble through writing it.
Fierce Marriage is not changing. We will continue to write, and learn, and share honestly with you whatever God shows us. We knew our time in Palm Desert was limited, but we didn’t know what that meant. Until now…
God is leading us to write our first book.
We’re being asked to write a book that helps young couples build deep, lasting, and Christ-centered marriages.
In order to do that, we’ve moved closer to family and are simplifying life – at least for the next few months. While we’re here, we will begin writing and setting the trajectory the book will carry. We’ll pray, write, pray some more, write some more, and spend quality time with our beloved friends and family.
Last weekend we moved from California back to our home state of Washington. We’re currently displaced and everything we own is packed deep into the truck, far from reach. We feel unsettled and disoriented, but we’re alright with it.
While we don’t know every single next step, we do know one: for now, we write.
What’s it mean?
We’re upping the ante on Fierce Marriage over the coming months. Writing takes a ton of time and we love doing it! However, we also love eating at least once or twice a day and having a roof over our heads that isn’t made of cardboard.
In other words, we need to figure out how to write more and still make a living. I’m not sure what that means exactly, but we’ll figure it out.
We could place ads on the blog, but let’s face it: ads are ugly (and distracting). But we still might do that… We may ask for support from close friends and family. We may ask for readers to chip in ($5/month goes a long way).
Like I said, I have little idea what the change entails, I just know we’re in the middle of it, and we could use your agreement in prayer.
The one thing we need most
The best thing you can do for us right now is to pray. It sounds a bit cliche, but it’s true; we desperately need prayer.
Pray for wisdom.
Pray that we would have open ears and obedient hearts.
Pray that we don’t just add pop-psychological noise to the literary landscape. This generation of young married couples doesn’t need more self-help garbage, we need God’s help. Period.
Pray that we understand deep biblical truths and can craft effective prose to genuinely communicate them to our generation.
Finally, please pray for God’s perfect provision.
I’m still working full time, and there are only so many hours in a day. Writing could take 10 hours/day without blinking, so wisdom in our business is needed to manage well and free up time.
We deeply appreciate your prayers for those things and we’ll keep you posted as this wonderfully ambiguous journey becomes more clear.
So that’s why we’ve been so quiet lately – we’ve been on the move. It’s remarkably hard to stop packing, planning, and driving to update the blog, especially with a little baby who loves being held.
Cheers to the future and whatever it entails!
– Ryan, Selena, and Baby Dela.