For Men, Leadership

10 Ways to Be the Husband Your Wife Needs (Part 2)

Being the husband your wife needs

This post is the second and last part of a series on how to be the husband your wife needs. If you haven’t already, I encourage you to review the first post as it lays a foundation for why we need to look to Jesus as our example of how to be the husband our wife needs most.

6. Teach: Jesus was a teacher (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John)

Jesus shared many parables to illustrate the truths of God. As husbands, we need to display an understanding of God’s word and principles and teach our families how to apply them in life. Jesus taught with parables so truth could be understood, and we should teach truth with the same loving attitude.

7. Be Tender: Jesus loved children (Matt 19:13-15)

Jesus was tender to kids. He didn’t speak to them harshly or lose his ‘cool’ with them. Rather, he saw in them an example of how we can have faith in our Heavenly Father. Our wives need us to model this behavior toward kids; I’m not a parent yet (4 months away!), but I’m fairly certain it’s true.

8. Protect: Jesus defended and protected people who needed help (Matt 19:13-15, Luke 18:9-14)

We can see this most vividly when Jesus rebuked the Pharisees. The religious people of the day were, by most accounts, oppressive. Jesus fought them harder than any other people group. Knowing God and how He works will give us discernment when injustice is around us – it may be situational (poor) or some kind of oppression that needs to be lifted. We need to be defenders and protectors in general, and certainly we must defend and protect our wives.

9. Correct: Jesus was a corrector (Mark 8:33, Luke 9:54-55, Rev 3:19)

As mentioned above, Jesus rebuked the Pharisees most harshly. He also rebuked his disciples when their faith was weak, and he rebuked various other individuals for sin in their lives. In all cases, Jesus corrected lovingly. As husbands, we need to be correctors, but not the stereotypical heavy-handed husbands of old. We need to lovingly correct our wives (and they need to correct us) when blind spots arise. Additionally, since we’re not Jesus, we need to be correctors of ourselves! (zing)

10. Provide: Jesus was a provider

Jesus performed miracles to provide: feeding the 5000 (John 6:5-15), turning water into wine (John 2:1-11) at a wedding (of all places!). Jesus provided then, he provides now. Jesus provided many different things, not just food. He provided instruction, love, comfort, peace, and above all, himself. As husbands, we often feel the charge to provide, but fall short of full provision. If we are really called to love our wives as Christ loves the Church, then we are called to provide on every level we can – from the smallest kind word to our entire lives.

This list is certainly not exhaustive. There are many, many lessons on being a husband found in the life of Jesus, as are there many more scriptures than what I have included here.

The Main Thing

As was noted early on in way number 1, numbers 2-10 above are all products of knowing God intimately.

Husbands, let’s get closer to God. Let’s pursue Him with 100% of who we are, with everything we’ve got. God is not a peripheral activity or side interest, God is the goal! As we pursue and know God more fully, not only will our needs be met in His perfection, but the needs of our wives and families as well.

(Photo by the talented Jeff Marsh)

Have you heard of the The 31-Day Pursuit Challenge?

Every marriage begins with passion, purpose, and pursuit, but few stay that way. That’s why we wrote Husband in Pursuit and Wife in Pursuit Together, they make what we’re calling the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge. Couples are encouraged take the challenge together. We’re already starting to hear stories of transformed marriages! Are you up for the challenge?

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