Dating Your Spouse, Friendship, Podcast, Priorities

3 Aspects of Unforgettable Dates After “I Do”

We haven’t always been the best at dating. Sure, we’ve been out to dinner and done many activities in the name of pursuing each other, but we haven’t been as intentional about it as we would’ve liked. And as our family has grown we’ve found ourselves dating even less.

As we’ve learned and grown in this area, we’ve discovered that there are a few unique aspects of truly unforgettable dates.

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Unforgettable dates don’t have much to do with what you do or where you do it, but how you connect deeply with each other.

Here’s what we learned:

3 Aspects of Unforgettable Dates After “I do”

1) Intentional connection

Every remarkable experience Selena and I have together has one thing in common: we connect. Connection takes many forms for us. It can be laughter and joking, meaningful conversation, just being together, or tender physical affection.

Connection is what marriage is all about. Deep oneness. It’s just how we’re wired. That’s what makes it so powerful and fulfilling. The thing is, we’re often too distracted to really connect with each other.

This is why we usually leave our phones at home or in a drawer. We’ve found that by setting the stage for connection we’re much more likely actually connect.

2) Creativity

For us, our default “date” is pretty boring. We usually just watch a movie or TV show after going to dinner, etc. That’s fine and definitely fun (i.e. relaxing), but easily forgettable.

Creative dating has a way of taking us out of our comfort zones, and that always makes for a memorable experience.

Creativity costs us something (time and energy to plan), and that usually means we’re much more “bought in.”

3) Time and energy

Distractions in life tend to absorb all of our extra time and energy. It’s important to leave margin in life to do things that really matter, and that means we set aside time and energy to make them happen!

Friday nights are typically considered date nights, but for us, by the time it hits, we’re zonked. We work hard all week, and we usually just want to relax. Not an optimal time for connection. Schedule your dates at a time where you won’t feel pressed for time and you’ll have energy to give each other your best.


What was your favorite date experience ever?

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