“Sustaining the marriage covenant” is flowery language for simply “sticking together”. Selena and I have a saying: “There is no Plan B in our marriage.” We have no backup plan or escape clause. This mentality has helped us stick together in simple but profound ways. In the absence of a backup plan, each spouse seeks reconciliation instead of relief. We both understand that we have…
Video: 12 Stages of a Proper Car Fight
We’ve all had plenty of fights… especially fights in the car. It’s become a bit of a joke for Selena and I, whenever we’re headed out on a road trip or a mini-getaway, we almost always have to spend the first hour “detoxing” from latent and yet-to-be-communicated frustrations. Our longer car rides usually start very pleasant and peaceful, much like a pot of water on…
We had a baby! What we’re learning about marriage in the first week of being parents
We’ve been pretty quiet on the blog lately, and for good reason. We had a little girl on December 1st! I wanted to take some time and share explicitly with you (because we love our FM community), and to process through a few things we’re already learning about what it means to be married and parents simultaneously. Many of our readers have been parents for…
My Wife Doesn’t Complete Me
As much as I want to echo Mr. Maguire, I can’t. Selena doesn’t complete me, and nor do I complete her. “You complete me” is a famous line, said during the romantic crux of Jerry Maguire, a mid-90s ‘dramedy’ blockbuster. Since then, phrases like this one and “you had me at hello” have become comic relief staples for many “bromances” and lighthearted Friday night movie-quote sessions.…
Pains and Rewards of the Humble Route
The humble route is hardly the desirable route to take in any situation, let alone marriage, but why? Why do we fight it? Often times we lean on ourselves; taking pride in our own ability to handle things, instead of leaning into Jesus during the challenging times with our spouse. Learning to trust him and take him at his Word is no small task, but it is
20 Simple Axioms for Marriage
Sometimes the simplest epiphanies have the most profound impact. I’ve found these tiny axioms to be helpful in keeping us on point in our marriage. We’ve written a few posts that reinforce some of these (linked below), but in every case they’ve helped us keep the important things first.
Video: What does selfless love look like?
UPDATE: Ian and Larissa have recently written a book about their remarkable story. It’s called “Eight Twenty Eight”, and you can check it out on their website. We talk about selfless love quite a bit. It truly is the ultimate goal for married couples to understand and live out selfless love: both in how we love each other and in how we experience Christ’s love.
7 Habits to Maintain Your Integrity When Traveling
Traveling is risky business. While it’s physically safe to travel, being away from home poses unique risks to your marriage if your character and integrity are weak. In fact, you’ll face the temptations and integrity-compromising situations I’ll be discussing in everyday life, but during solo travel they’re much more apparent. Traveling is an escape of sorts. You’re whisked away on a plane to a faraway…
Video: What Does 50 Years of Marriage Look Like?
So what does 50 years of marriage and friendship look like? Bill & Glad show us a glimpse. I simply had to share their story. As Selena will attest, I’m not really a cryer. It’s not that I don’t feel, I think I’m just pretty even-keel about things. I think she can count on one hand the times she’s seen me cry…our wedding day, the death…
3 Ps That Can Poison Your Marriage (Part 2)
In my last post I discussed our ‘propensity for poison’ and covered the first P that can poison your marriage. If you haven’t, I encourage you to read it first, as it prefaces this post and sets a solid foundation. With that said, let’s dive right in to the second and third Ps that can poison your marriage. The Three Ps That Can Poison Your…