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October 20, 2014

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Hi, we’re Ryan and Selena Frederick.

Ryan & Selena, authors and curators of Fierce Marriage

Fierce Marriage is our blog devoted to helping couples build better marriages. We believe that building a Christ-centered marriage requires a fierce tenacity that never gives up and never gives in; there is no Plan B. When we vowed “Till death do us part”, we meant it!

Here we hope you find lots of useful advice that can help your marriage! We encourage you to join our mailing list, find us on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram, and please share your thoughts by commenting on posts.  – Ryan & Selena

10 Keys to 42 Years of Loving Marriage

August 20, 2014 |

My parents celebrated 42 years of marriage yesterday. I’m incredibly proud of them – especially knowing first-hand all they’ve endured to get there. The best part is that they’re thriving, still deeply committed and in love. I wanted to honor and celebrate them; but I also wanted to learn from them.

So I asked them to write out their secrets: “What are 5 things that have made your marriage last all these years?” They each responded in their own words below. (My dad is an old soul and very email averse; so he hand wrote his response and my mom typed it into an email. lol… ) As you’ll see in their responses, there is no doubt that this blog and our marriage is a direct reflection of them. Read More

4 Things Every Husband Needs to Hear Daily

August 15, 2014 |

Men don’t often receive credit for their complexity. One of my biggest annoyances is how husbands are often portrayed in commercials and TV shows: emotionally unaware, irresponsible, wide-eyed, and well… a little dumb. Those portrayals provide for a half-hearted chuckle, but they’re caricatures.

I’d like to clear the air a bit. I may not speak for every man, but I have a feeling I speak for most.
Read More

Book Review: The Best Yes (by Lysa Terkeurst)

August 12, 2014 |

In a recent post I shared my latest struggle in our current situation and I have to say that God has been providing me with more encouragement, hope and contentment than I have had in a long time. I know that part of that is because of the precious prayers from our FM community – how do I even begin to thank you? What a special blessing each of you are to us and to each other.

Another way that God has been directing me is through another book that I’ve had the privilege to dive into, Lysa Terkeurst’s latest The Best Yes. Talk about timing. Read More

Let it Go: Pebbles, Mountains, & Marriage

July 31, 2014 |

Last night as I sat and watched Nova, Selena was quietly nursing and reading a book about baby stuff. I looked over at her, reflecting about all she gives to our little family – sacrificing herself constantly for the welfare of our 8 month old daughter. I marveled at her unwavering support of me with deep appreciation.

“You’re an incredible wife and mother”, I expressed. “I see all you do, and I want you to know how much I appreciate it.”

Still reading, she looked up at me with her beautiful brown eyes and olive complexion and said, “Don’t play with your beard, it’s annoying.”


“What?? Really??” I thought. Read More

Thankfulness: Learning How to Speak a New Language

July 29, 2014 |

If you asked me how I would describe my life in one word, I would of course have to use two and say “in-between.”

Our latest life adventure has taken us to the small fishing town of Westport, WA where we are blessed to be able to enjoy summer a stone’s throw away from the beautiful Pacific Ocean. Read More

Marriage Hacks: 25 Practical Ways to Make Love Last

July 25, 2014 |

If you do a search for “life hacks”, you’ll get a veritable smorgasbord of results – videos, blog posts, and commentaries – all helpful for streamlining your daily life. A friend recently released a free eBook called “Marriage Hacks: 25 Practical Ways to Make Love Last” with the same goal for young married couples: give young, disillusioned couples a refreshing dose of marital truths. Read More

How Our Friendships Affect Our Marriage

July 23, 2014 |

All too often I’m guilty of allowing ungodly friendships to have a “say” in my marriage.

I’m not saying we’re suppose to shun all of our married unbeliever friends and never hangout with them. What I am saying is that having filters on who we let have a voice in our marriage is a way of fighting fiercely for it. Read More

The “Phone Drop Test” Every Couple Should Consider

July 10, 2014 |

You can tell a person’s character by how they use their smartphone. It’s a veritable thermometer for the health of your integrity.

What would happen if you immediately dropped your phone (unlocked) and your spouse picked it up? What thoughts go through your mind? What would your husband/wife discover? Read More