We are in the season of having young children in our house: two sweet daughters, Adelaide (age 3) and Clementine (6 months). This, sometimes chaotic, new reality we find ourselves in is one we have waited and prayed for (yes, we prayed for chaos, somewhat unknowingly LOL). And as beautiful and wonderful as having little ones is, it has without a doubt affected and challenged our marriage…
5 Ways Advent Can Transform Your Marriage
I can’t believe Christmas is almost here…again. I have this habit: every year, the day after Christmas I say to myself, “before you know it, it will be Christmas again”. Sure enough, here we are. I have to be honest, I find parts of this holiday wearing. The biggest frustration I have (and you may share it) is the consumerism of it all. Somehow we…
Irritating Car Rides & My Subtle Holiday Pride
Around the holidays my pride flares up in nuanced ways. It’s subtle, and you could even say it’s harmless but I assure you it’s not. As I’ve thought about it more, I’ve realized that I’m trying to be better than others — and it’s exhausting. Yep, I’m talking about the ugly kind of pride.
Devotion: Listen, Laugh, Love
Remember that you began as friends. Your earliest moments as a couple likely included plenty of conversation, laughter, and fun. Your foundation of friendship will sustain you when feelings of romance come and go. Celebrate your history together! Laugh more, encourage constantly, listen intently, and share transparently. Consider this passage: “When the Lord restored the fortunes of Zion, we were like those who dream. Then…
Me, My Anger, & My Marriage
On our drive home from a pretty fun evening out with the kiddos, Ryan and I got into it. After sifting through my feelings of him being a jerk to me in front of our friends while he was thinking he was “helping” me he asked me, “Over the past few years, it seems like your default response to things, (situations, relationships, etc.) that you don’t like or…
Devotion: Love vs. Lust
It’s important to make a sharp distinction between love and lust in marriage. When a husband and wife love each other’s souls, time and aging only strengthen their love. Lust has the opposite effect. Understanding the differences between the two will help you address toxic tendencies directly. Here are a few key distinctions between lust and love: Lust is selfish, love is selfless. Lust is…
3 Ways I’m Pursuing My Wife & How it Multiplies Our Love
As a follower of Christ and a husband, I’m learning what it means to truly love my wife “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Eph 5:25). That oft-quoted marriage passage is chock full of depth. Most days I find it’s charge unbearable. I’m a man… a human man. I sin and I have selfish tendencies. How can I possibly love my…
Identifying & Ending Cycles of Harmful Behavior in Marriage
I watched a video a while back that completely wrecked me. It’s a message delivered by Francis Chan where he talks about the parable of the sower. As he explained Jesus’ words, one phrase hit me like a ton of bricks: “Don’t assume you are the good soil.” If you spend any time online, you’ll read dozens of Christian pick-me-up phrases daily; bite-size sermons condensed to…
Devotion: 4 Ways to “Design Your Time”
True quality time is becoming a lost art. There are more opportunities for wasting time than at any other period in history: smart phones, social media, streaming entertainment, 100s of cable channels, you name it. Paul urges us to use our time wisely: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days…
Video: How to Fight Familiarity in Your Marriage
When you spend your life getting to know the same person, you get the awesome privilege to know them more deeply than anyone else on the planet – and they you. However, familiarity in your marriage is a double edged sword. If we’re not careful we can become too familiar with each other which can cause problems. These issues can range from forgetting to extend small common…